The main reason I had gastric bypass surgery was not just that I was fat and couldn't lose weight. Sure, OBVIOUSLY there was that, but mainly I was too fat to get pregnant naturally and I was too afraid to try fertility treatments. I know it seems crazy to choose to have my guts cut open and drastically rearranged BEFORE popping a few Clomid, but that was the choice I made. I feared that there was a REASON my body wasn't getting pregnant and I was worried that if I forced the issue and got pregnant before I lost weight, I would have a high risk pregnancy. I also knew that getting pregnant might cause me to gain even more weight and that afterwards, I'd have even more trouble dieting. Also, surgery was covered by my insurance and fertility treatments weren't. It didn't turn out to be that hard of a decision at all.
Basically, I wasn't ovulating, hadn't ovulated for years and I had all the symptoms of Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome. Even though I never had an ultrasound to check for the cysts themselves, my blood work was textbook PCOS. High testosterone, wonky estrogen, you name it. For years I took ovulation predictor tests like my life depended on it and never once got a positive result. I got a period every 90 days or so, but it was basically brought on by gravity, not hormones. I had to go on birth control pills every few months just to make sure I had a real period. It was bad.
Both my primary care physician (the one who recommended me for the surgery) and the surgeons themselves said the same thing: after you loose weight, getting pregnant will be a cinch. One of them actually used the phrase "oodles of babies." Both doctors also gave me the same strict advice: WAIT AT LEAST ONE YEAR BEFORE TRYING TO GET PREGNANT.
Fat stores estrogen, so when you lose weight, you basically pee pure estrogen and become a huge raging ball of crazy hormones. I got my first period at exactly 30 days post-op. The surgery completely restarted my biological clock. I started ovulating again and got my period every 30 days from then on. Which of course meant I needed to go on birth control to prevent getting pregnant while I was still losing weight so quickly. After the first month, I went to my OBGYN to try to figure something out. It turned out to be harder than I anticipated. I couldn't take the pill because early post-ops have difficulty absorbing nutrients in pill form. I couldn't take the birth control shots because they can cause infertility for up to a year AFTER you stop taking them and I couldn't afford to wait that long for normal cycles to return. You can't have an IUD until you've had a baby and I couldn't find anyone to give me that Norplant thing since it turns out doctors stopped prescribing them.
I ended up trying the birth control patch. Unfortunately, the patch is only guaranteed to work on women who weigh less than 200 pounds (I think! Check with your doctor!) and I wasn't there yet. My doctor basically said to use condoms along with the patch. For the record, I hated the patch. Not only did it not work for me (I got my period in the middle of my cycle), but the stupid thing is disgusting. It gets sticky all around the edges and you end up with this dirty, black lint-rimmed band-aid on your ass, which is just SO sexy and then you have to take it off and put a new one in a different spot and you end up with all these dirty, sticky patches of skin all over you. SO GROSS. I knew it wasn't working, so I quickly stopped using it and instead of using condoms, Dave and I decided it was better to, uh, how should I put this, not make any deposits and that worked just fine for us.
Until it didn't.
Two days after Christmas, on December 27, 2002, Dave left a deposit even though he knew he wasn't really supposed to and that I might get pregnant. It wasn't an accident, either. At the time I was selfishly a little miffed because I had my eyes on THE GOAL WEIGHT, but figured we were okay. I mean, we'd been actively TRYING to get pregnant for several years with zero luck, so what was ONE slip-up?! No big deal. I wrote an "OOPS" on my calendar that day and then promptly forgot about it. The sex had been awesome enough to make up for it anyhow. (Losing weight and getting smaller? DOES HELP!)
Two weeks later I went to take off my bra in my usual fashion, which is to unhook the back and yank it off in one fell swoop, letting my sweater pups fly (or in my case, flop) where they will. Only this time I YELPED. The pain was TERRIBLE. I had never had such sore breasts in my entire life. I knew that was an early pregnancy symptom so I put my cycle information into an ovulation calendar and realized that I had almost definitely been ovulating on the night of our infamous "oops." I wasn't technically due for my period for another few days because I'd been on a 30 day cycle, but every fiber in my being knew already that I was pregnant.
I remember walking into the bathroom to look at myself in the mirror. I was terrified, I mean I wasn't even FIVE MONTHS post-op and every doctor I'd seen had warned me to wait a whole year before trying to get pregnant, but man, I was happy. I remember smiling at myself and thinking, you're totally going to be someone's MOM. It was the best feeling in the world.
[I realize this segment is taking FOREVER, so I'll continue it again later this week. I've actually been hoping I'd be able to someday find the time to write a nonfiction book about pregnancy after weight-loss surgery, so I'll try not to ramble on too much more here.]
It's wonderful that you've chosen to share your story...thank you. I, too, do not ovulate due to weight issues, however, my blood work does not show PCOS. My first three kids are all 8 years apart...I guess I ovulate every 7 years!
Posted by: Stacey | February 20, 2008 at 03:59 AM
Aw, this is so sweet.
These have been really interesting and fun to read. You are so honest. Thanks for sharing them.
Posted by: stephanie | February 20, 2008 at 06:50 AM
actually estrogen stores fat not the other way around the hormones of estrogen and inscilin store fat and when you have PCOS as I have the body is so out of wack that it gives up trying to break down the sugars and stores food as fat like right away.
Posted by: alana | February 20, 2008 at 06:57 AM
Actually, you don't HAVE to have had a child to get an IUD. You need a doctor who understands your wishes. I had an IUD for several years, during a period when I didn't think I wanted to have kids ever, then married Mr. Right and had it removed. Had no problems at all getting pregnant (with twins!).
Posted by: Nancy | February 20, 2008 at 09:59 AM
We, too used to practice the ol pull and pray. Our daughter was born 9 months later.
LOL
Posted by: Type (little) a | February 20, 2008 at 10:24 AM
We women just know our bodies. I knew the minute my hubby rolled off of me (TMI?) that I was knocked up. And I swear the heartburn started the next day!!
Posted by: Ali | February 20, 2008 at 02:59 PM
I am loving these first person accounts of your experience with surgery.
Ditto the previous comment- I have an IUD, which I love, and I have never had children.
Posted by: s.a. | February 20, 2008 at 07:59 PM
another ditto on the IUD w/o babies thing -- I've got one. But that's not really the point, the point is I like reading your surgery and post-op stories!
Posted by: janet | February 21, 2008 at 10:04 AM
I have been diagnosed with PCOS and have been on treatment for 3 years now. After all the medicine and all the different things I have to do, I am still having miscarriages! I too heard it from my Family doctor AND my fertility OBGYN that I needed to lose weight if I wanted to carry full term. I am looking forward to my surgery (April 24th) but I'm sooo scared at the same time. I thought about asking for an IUD but was under the impression that you can't get one unless you've actually had a child. I will, next week go to the OBGYN and ask for this IUD before my surgery so that I don't have to worry about getting pregnant again until I'm ready. Thanks for your honesty and all the TMI on your posts. It actually brings it down to a "real" story! And that's something we all need to hear!
Posted by: Ruth | March 31, 2008 at 08:19 PM
Hi! I goggled "how long do you have to wait after having a bypass to get pregnant" and was lead to your blog.
Awesome.
I have read all of your bypass blogs, as well as many others... such as your garden, your sick hubby and your naked-trying-to-potty-train-daughter.
I have to say that I absolutely LOVE your blog. I can relate to so many things that you are saying, and I myself am going through the process of getting insurance approval for the roux-en-y bypass. My husband already got approved and will be having his on 6-9-08 - just about a week away! It’s good to read about your experience and how everything turned out well for you. We already have one child, but want to start trying for another in the early part of next year.... that’s how I found your blog. My doctor is suggesting we wait two years, and I wanted to read more about real females who didn't wait.
I am anxiously awaiting gastric bypass part 7!
Thanks for the awesome blog. I have been reading literally for hours.
Posted by: taylor k. | May 30, 2008 at 04:18 PM
just found your blog, and have been so interested in the gastric bypass...but "Part Seven: Pregnancy after gastric bypass surgery " takes me to a blank page! this is what I really want to know...hmm..
Posted by: lilymorg | August 26, 2008 at 03:17 PM
Amanda,
Wow! So I can't stop reading your blogs. I was trying to open the next one Part 7 and for some reason it's not working. Maybe you're still working on it. I would love to chat some time... I can't image how you most be in person after reading your stories, but you seem to be an awesome person!
[email protected]
Posted by: Marie | September 12, 2008 at 06:34 AM
this is such a great surgery. I believe in this surgery. My friend just had this surgery and went very well. He has lost a 100 pounds.
health and weightloss tips
weight loss information
Posted by: weightloss tips | March 16, 2009 at 05:05 PM
My mother suffered from obesity all her life. Two years ago who underwent this surgery and her life changed completely.
Posted by: Toenails | September 16, 2009 at 06:51 AM
My father suffered the same case of Toenails's mother!!!
Posted by: Hepatocellular Carcinoma | September 22, 2009 at 09:15 AM
There are tones of ways to lose weight one just has to find the diet that's right for him or her. Personally I prefer a body cleanse before venturing into any weight loss program as it always rids the body of toxins. What I've realized is most people rush into weight loss programs and although they may look great outwardly, they feel terible inside and there bodies as still prone to illnesses
Posted by: How To Lose Weight Quickly | November 01, 2009 at 10:18 AM
The cost of the procedure varies by geographic market and facility selected. You find the option you think best but the safest
Posted by: Buy Generic Viagra | November 03, 2009 at 02:20 PM
If you are significantly overweight, and looking for a real solution, maybe it can change your life!
Posted by: No Prescription Online | November 04, 2009 at 08:01 AM
There is expected to be a significant reduction in risks of heart disease, pulmonary disease and cancers.
Posted by: Buy Viagra Prescription | November 06, 2009 at 05:16 AM
I certainly can't afford to have bypass surgery especially when you're greatly overweight then you will need surgery again to rid your self of all the extra skin. Someone suggested exercise etc. But its never easy. The cost of bypass surgery in my country is very exorbitant and the risk is far greater outside places like the US etc.
Well on another note I'm thinking of trying the master cleanse and see what the results are. Anyway thanks for the great post
Posted by: | November 12, 2009 at 04:40 AM
Up until recently I to was too big to concieve, but now I have my baby, and a new weight loss mission begins!!! Tori
Posted by: Tori | June 24, 2010 at 03:08 AM
are you going to finish the out come. I would like to know if you gain weight after the baby, where you able to keep the weight off. This is an interest story
Posted by: Danielle | February 14, 2012 at 09:56 AM
are you going to finish the out come. I would like to know if you gain weight after the baby, where you able to keep the weight off. This is an interest story
Posted by: charmingdate scam | April 26, 2013 at 02:33 AM